I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
