doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize
