I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Randomize
