so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize