I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
