The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
