I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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