we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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