k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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