I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
