its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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