You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
A+ Viking dick
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
