I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize