My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
