that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize