he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Let the clothes fall where they may.
The air taste purple.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
