How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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