just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
