I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Sorry about my life...
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
