me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
