Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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