i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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