Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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