So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Randomize
