Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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