YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
