shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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