dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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