Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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