2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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