the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
We are two peas in an std pod
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
