Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
