remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
