i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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