alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
