never play flip cup with pint glasses
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Even my vagina gasped.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
