We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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