i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
