Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
