she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
