OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
