he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Dick very happy bro
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
