It was confusing and full of hummus
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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