This girl is more easily done than said...
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize