She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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