I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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