awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
