I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
