but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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