I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
